This morning, as I was serving breakfast to my daughter and for the thousandth time she asked me for this or that or another helping of whatnot and all I wanted was a moment for myself to sit with her and enjoy my meal, then, it suddenly hit me!
“Family Style”It’s not just about an abundance of food on the table.. it’s about peace!!
What is family style?
All these years of going to fun and funky Italian places in California that served at big tables, all together with big bowls and baskets of food, “family style” and I didn’t get it, until now! I just thought it was funny and friendly sharing large amounts of pasta, bread, etc on the table. We so rarely do this. Usually, I just serve up a plate to Ella and it’s fine. And, I like arranging.
Yet, these days, she asks for more of various things and I find myself getting super annoyed having to get up for things over and over when I am hoping, just this time to eat my eggs warm! Then, it hit me.. family style!! Oh! Now, I finally get it. Italian moms, big families and who wants to get up over and over to serve more. Who wants cold food? ! Smart! So, from now on ,the bowls go on the table. Not just at dinner occasionally, but from now on at all meals. I need a break. I need some moments to breath in and out, to sit, to start my day with space for connecting, for creative ideas to come and for me. And, yep, I want to enjoy warm food and be sitting with my daughter.. not running back and forth like a hurried waiter.
Bringing in the support vibe
Maybe it’s also that I view family style as large groups of people, noisy, screaming, laughing and having a warm exchange. Perhaps, even with only the 2 of us, I need to see it as more of an occasion, bring that “Family Style” energy into our space., that feeling of support and joy and exchange, not just.. “OK, let’s eat” and just be done with it. Especially when partners are away working or with previous family.. this feeling is soooo needed. Right?!
New start to each day
That said, I do like arranging the plates with designs and faces, so it’s a different vibe. Yet, why not have both and get the rest and space for me.? I am so black and white, either/or. Time to mix it up.. arrange the plate nicely as we/I set everything out. AND, put out the bowls of food for all to enjoy in one place, no running. Yes! THIS is how I would like to start the day.. warm food, smiles, connection and seeing what comes next.. before we all go in our various directions or the “to do lists” begin.
It’s all about clearing space
Whatever works to get us more time.. to lead us to more space for self, breathing space for ideas to come while we chew and to then maybe even have space to create. The road may be long, but slowly we are getting there.
So, go try the next meal “family style”, if you don’t already. And, tell us your own secrets to making space at the start of the day.
Have a beautifully Imperfect, “Family style” day.